Hello lovelies! This recipe contains some of my favourite ingredients--chickpeas, sweet potatoes and kale. I do *a lot* of recipe browsing on the internet and sometimes you see a recipe that hits you POW! and you think,
"That looks amazing. I have everything to make that right in my kitchen I don't have to think about it, just follow the recipe and eat up all that deliciousness."
Then Spiderman laughs as he knows I cannot follow a recipe exactly. There must be little tweaks.
I did try with this recipe. Honestly. Hand on heart. I made it exactly as it was described on the blog Keepin' It Kind which you can read {HERE} we ended up liking it without the lemon tahini sauce. I mean, lemon and tahini are two more of my favourite things, so i thought we'd love it, but these days we eat this bowl NAKED.
Or NEKKID if you are from the American South.
Sometimes I just make the sweet potatoes and have them with my pimped baked beans cos we are wild like that.
I told you I don't follow the rules.
But this is worth trying with the sauce if you like that sort of thing. Find the sauce recipe {HERE}
But here is my version of Keepin' It Kind's bowl of deliciousness.
Cheesy Sweet Potato and Chickpea Bowl
Preheat your oven to 220C/425F
Add the following to your roasting tin: 2 medium (or 3 small) sweet potatoes cut into small chunks 1 TB oil 3 TB nutritional yeast flakes to make it cheesy 1/2 tsp garlic powder shake smoked paprika salt and pepper to taste
Stir well to get everything coated.
Bake for 15 minutes, the remove from the oven and stir and bake another 15 minutes.
When you have stirred and put the sweet potatoes back in the oven, work on the chickpea part.
The chickpea part: 1 tin chickpeas, drained and rinsed 4-5 button mushrooms chopped
Cook those together in the pan until the mushrooms cook down and the add: 100g kale, destemmed and torn into bite sized pieces (about 4-5 cups)
Cook this until the kale has softened and reduced then add: 2 TB tamari or soy sauce 2 tsp mixed herbs 2 TB lemon juice (I use from a squeezy bottle and it is fine)
That's it. By this time the sweet potatoes are all dry and crispy and cheesy and the kale and chickpeas are all cooked and savoury from the tamari, lemon and mixed herbs.
It is a lovely taste combination (with or without the lemon tahini sauce)
Hello and welcome to Murder Ballad Monday. Last week we began looking at murder ballads with a humorous slant. This week is no exception.
If you don't know Tom Lehrer then you don't know what you are missing. He is a Harvard educated mathematician who was famous for his pithy, humorous songs. His dry sense of humour really appeals to me and was one of the first things Spiderman and I discovered we had in common--a love for these witty songs.
He is known in the adult world for songs like The Elements where he sings all the elements on the Periodic table to the tune of I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major General from Gilbert and Sullivan's The Pirates of Penzance.
He is know in the kiddie world as the singer of some of the best songs from The Electric Company such as LY and Silent E. I still use both of these when teaching to explain these concepts.
But the song I want to discuss today is entitled The Irish Ballad from his 1953 album Songs by Tom Lehrer which makes fun of of this style of sob-story tragedy ballads, so common in Irish lore. He sings with a perfectly straight face an increasingly disturbing catalogue of murders by a young girl who does her whole family in. He includes elements of traditional folk ballads--an "idiotic refrain" with the words rickety-tickety-tin, interminable verses and a wrong note played every now and then to sound authentic.
There are even two punchlines--one where she arrested for her crimes and one where the singer denounces the audience saying:
My tragic tale, I won't prolong,
Rickety-tickety-tin,
My tragic tale I won't prolong,
And if you do not enjoy the song,
You've yourselves to blame if it's too long,
You should never have let me begin, begin,
You should never have let me begin.
It is a true masterpiece of comedy. I have included the lyrics below if you'd like to follow along.
About a maid
I'll sing a song,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
About a maid I'll sing a song
Who didn't have her family long.
Not only did she do them wrong,
She did ev'ryone of them in, them in,
She did ev'ryone of them in.
One morning in a fit of pique,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
One morning in a fit of pique,
She drowned her father in the creek.
The water tasted bad for a week,
And we had to make do with gin, with gin,
We had to make do with gin.
Her mother she could never stand,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
Her mother she could never stand,
And so a cyanide soup she planned.
The mother died with a spoon in her hand,
And her face in a hideous grin, a grin,
Her face in a hideous grin.
She set her sister's hair on fire,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
She set her sister's hair on fire,
And as the smoke and flame rose high'are,
Danced around the funeral pyre,
Playin' a violin, -olin,
Playin' a violin.
She weighted her brother down with stones,
Rickety-tickety-tin,
She weighted her brother down with stones,
And sent him off to davy jones.
All they ever found were some bones,
And occasional pieces of skin, of skin,
Occasional pieces of skin.
One day when she had nothing to do,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
One day when she had nothing to do,
She cut her baby brother in two,
And served him up as an irish stew,
And invited the neighbors in, -bors in,
Invited the neighbors in.
And when at last the police came by,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
And when at last the police came by,
Her little pranks she did not deny,
To do so she would have had to lie,
And lying, she knew, was a sin, a sin,
Lying, she knew, was a sin.
My tragic tale, I won't prolong,
Rickety-tickety-tin,
My tragic tale I won't prolong,
And if you do not enjoy the song,
You've yourselves to blame if it's too long,
You should never have let me begin, begin,
You should never have let me begin.
That's all for this week. Stay tuned next week for a tale of a white trash murder.
Hello lovelies! My goodness, it has been a busy week. I have been rushed off my feet meeting deadlines and have needed some quick and easy meals to get me through.
I was so rushed, in fact, that I forgot to post a recipe last week. Shock! Horror! I only realised I had missed a week when it came time to write this week's recipe. My apologies, loyal readers. As repayment for my forgetfulness, I shall give you two recipes for the price of one (and since you don't actually pay anything to read this, that's a pretty sweet deal!)
Last week I tried out two new roasted chickpea recipes. You can't go wrong with roasted chickpeas. Throw on some oil and spices and roast for 30 minutes and they become chewy, slightly crispy and 100% delicious. There are a zillion combinations, depending on which spices you use. Here are two very different ones that were equally yummy
I adapted this first recipe from one that was meant to be a tempeh marinade. I have nothing against tempeh except the price. A packet of this fermented soya costs around £3 to £4 and a tin of chickpeas costs me 33p. You do the math.
Indian Roasted Chickpeas with Potatoes, Mango and Kale
Preheat your oven to 200C/400F
In your largest roasting tin add the following: 1 tin chickpeas, drained and rinsed 1 small onion, diced small half a pepper, diced small one small carrot, diced small Marinade:
In a small bowl mix the following and pour it over the chickpeas mixture, stir well to coat. 1 TB oil 1 TB tamari or soy sauce 1 TB liquid sweetener (agave, maple syrup or the one I used golden syrup) 2 cloves crushed garlic 1 tsp turmeric 1 tsp ground cumin 1 tsp (or to taste) red chilli flakes 1 tsp ground ginger
Bake for 30 minutes stirring halfway. Serve with potatoes boiled in vegetable stock, a chopped mango and sauteed kale or other favourite greens. I used a heaping cup of frozen mango that had been defrosted over night in my fridge instead of fresh mango as frozen is cheaper.
Mediterranean Chickpeas with Lemon Potatoes I just used the spice profile for a recipe for Mediterranean chicken and used it in a cruelty free way. I often use lemon juice from a bottle, but this recipe really benefits from the brightness of a fresh lemon.
Preheat your oven to 200C/400F
In your largest roasting tin add the following: 1 tin chickpeas, drained and rinsed 1 small onion, diced small half a pepper, diced small one small carrot, diced small
Marinade:
In a small bowl mix the following and pour it over the chickpeas mixture, stir well to coat. 1 TB oil Zest of one fresh lemon Juice of half a lemon (save the juice of the other half for the potatoes) 1 TB red wine vinegar 1 tsp each dried basil, oregano and parsley 1/2 tsp salt 2 cloves crushed garlic
Bake for 30 minutes stirring halfway. Serve with potatoes boiled in vegetable stock. After the potatoes are cooked and drained add the remaining juice of other half a lemon and some chopped oil packed sun dried tomatoes plus salt and pepper and a dash of mixed herbs.
I made it with potatoes as that is what we had, but the next time we eat this (and there will be a next time) I will make it with my Greek Salad with Feta mushrooms. you can find that recipe {HERE}
So, sorry for forgetting a week. Hope that having two roasted chickpea recipes makes up for that. They are both delicious and economical and as always cruelty free.
Hello and welcome to Murder Ballad Monday. Up until now, all of the ballads have been serious. I hadn't really thought about the fact that a song about murder could be funny (even silly) until I thought about this song.
So, for the next few weeks we will look at murder ballads with a humorous slant.
Last week we looked at a very serious song about gun violence. Working in a school in Louisiana, I saw my share of gun violence and how it affected my students. I am very serious when it comes to guns. I don't think it is clever or funny to pretend to shoot anyone. In the UK, I have always pulled a child aside and talked to them about the gun violence I have seen and how it is not a good way to play. They are often shocked when they hear true stories about real shootings. True stories about children I know who were shot.
So, why is this song an exception? Well, The Homecoming Queen's Got a Gun is less about shooting and more about being part of those 1950's doo-wop Teenage Tragedy songs. You know, like Leader of the Pack or Tell Laura I Love Her. It is a satirical look at the shallowness of teenage girls rather than about mass shootings (even though it contains one.)
I first heard this song on the Dr Demento show. I fell in love with Julie Brown and her silly Valley Girl persona (see also: Cause I'm a Blond from the film Earth Girl's Are Easy) and Spiderman and I continually quote this song to each other, even now.
Julie Brown has said that after the Columbine High shootings, she doesn't feel comfortable singing this song in her live shows anymore and I understand that. In 1983, you could still make fun of things like this. These days, it just feels too tragic to do so.
The song was originally released as a B-Side to her self-released single I Like 'Em Big And Stupid and was later re-released in 1984 on her Goddess in Progress and re-released again on her 1987 album Trapped In The Body Of a White Girl.
The video, full of Julie Brown at her Valley Girl best, was a huge hit with Spiderman and me. We still say things like Stop it Debbi, you're embarrassing me! whenever the other person does something outlandish in public As well as An hour later the cops arrived and I said . . . in her good ear.
The video is a comic masterpiece, so you don't want to miss it. You do have to suspend your disbelief as she shoots around 24 times and never reloads, but it is a comedy so I can let it slide. However, I have included the lyrics below if you'd like to follow along.
Did you see that bit at the end where someone steals her tiara? Priceless.
It
was homecoming night at my high school
Everyone was there, it was totally cool
I was real excited, I almost wet my jeans
Cause my best friend Debbi was homecoming queen
She looked so pretty in pink chiffon
Riding the float with her tiara on
Holding this humongous bouquet in her hand
She looked straight out of Disneyland
You know, like, the Cinderella ride
I mean definitely an E-ticket
The crowd was cheering, everyone was stoked
I mean it was like the whole school was totally coked or something
The band was playing "Evergreen"
Then all of a sudden, somebody screamed
"Look out—the homecoming queen's got a gun"
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
Debbi's smiling and waving her gun
Picking off cheerleaders one by one
Oh, Buffy's pompom just blew to bits
Oh no, Mitzi's head just did the splits
God, my best friend's on a shooting spree
Stop it, Debbi, you're embarrassing me
How could you do what you just did
Are you having a really bad period?
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
(Stop Debbi, you're making a mess
Powder burns all over your dress)
An hour later, the cops arrived
By then the entire Glee Club had died—no big loss
You wouldn't believe what they brought to stop her
Tear gas, machine guns, even a chopper
(Throw down your gun and tiara and come out of the float)
Debbi didn't listen to what the cop said
She aimed and fired, and now the math teacher's dead
Oh, it's really sad, but kind of a relief
I mean, we had this big test coming up next week
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
(Debbi's really having a blast
She's wasting half of the class)
The cops fired a warning shot that blew her off the float
I tried to scream "duck" but it stuck in my throat
She hit the ground and did a flip, it was real acrobatic
But I was crying so hard, I couldn't work my Instamatic
I ran down to Debbi, I had to find out
What made her do it, why'd she freak out
I saw the bullet had got her right in the ear
I knew then the end was near
So I ran down and I said, in her good ear
"Debbi, why did you do it"
She raised her head, smiled, and said
"I did it for Johnny"
Johnny
Well, like, who's Johnny
Answer me, Debbi, who's Johnny
Does anybody here know Johnny
Are you Johnny
There was one guy named Johnny
But he was a total geek
He always had food in his braces
Answer me, Debbi, who's Johnny
Oh
god, this is like that movie "Citizen Kane"
You know, where you later find out Rosebud was a sled
But we'll never know who Johnny was
Cause, like, she's dead
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a
Everybody run
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun.
It
was homecoming night at my high school
Everyone was there, it was totally cool
I was real excited, I almost wet my jeans
Cause my best friend Debbi was homecoming queen
She looked so pretty in pink chiffon
Riding the float with her tiara on
Holding this humongous bouquet in her hand
(Bouquet)
She looked straight out of Disneyland
You know, like, the Cinderella ride
I mean definitely an E-ticket
The crowd was cheering, everyone was stoked
(Was stoked)
I mean it was like the whole school was totally coked or something
The band was playing "Evergreen"
Then all of a sudden, somebody screamed
"Look out—the homecoming queen's got a gun"
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
Debbi's smiling and waving her gun
Picking off cheerleaders one by one
Oh, Buffy's pompom just blew to bits
Oh no, Mitzi's head just did the splits
God, my best friend's on a shooting spree
Stop it, Debbi, you're embarrassing me
How could you do what you just did
Are you having a really bad period?
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
(Stop Debbi, you're making a mess
Powder burns all over your dress)
An hour later, the cops arrived
By then the entire Glee Club had died—no big loss
You wouldn't believe what they brought to stop her
Tear gas, machine guns, even a chopper
(Throw down your gun and tiara and come out of the float)
Debbi didn't listen to what the cop said
She aimed and fired, and now the math teacher's dead
Oh, it's really sad, but kind of a relief
I mean, we had this big test coming up next week
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun
(Debbi's really having a blast
She's wasting half of the class)
The cops fired a warning shot that blew her off the float
I tried to scream "duck" but it stuck in my throat
She hit the ground and did a flip, it was real acrobatic
But I was crying so hard, I couldn't work my Instamatic
I ran down to Debbi, I had to find out
What made her do it, why'd she freak out
I saw the bullet had got her right in the ear
I knew then the end was near
So I ran down and I said, in her good ear
"Debbi, why did you do it"
She raised her head, smiled, and said
"I did it for Johnny"
Johnny
Well, like, who's Johnny
Answer me, Debbi, who's Johnny
Does anybody here know Johnny
Are you Johnny
There was one guy named Johnny
But he was a total geek
He always had food in his braces
Answer me, Debbie, who's Johnny
Oh
god, this is like that movie "Citizen Kane"
You know, where you later find out Rosebud was a sled
But we'll never know who Johnny was
Cause, like, she's dead
Everybody run
The homecoming queen's got a gun
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a
Everybody run
Everybody run
The homecoming queen has got a gun.
That’s
all for this week. Stay tuned next week for a (not so) traditional Irish Ballad
This is not unusual. I dream vividly every night. A
few nights ago, I had a terrible nightmare that I left bread baking in our oven
and went off to Canterbury Cathedral with my in-laws who were here on holiday
and our house burned down killing the Spiderbabes and the Bronte snail GALS.
No, this was one of my “crack-ass” dreams (as
Spiderman calls them.)
I am a firm believer that your everyday life bleeds
into your dreams. We have been watching DVD marathons of Law and Orderfrom seasons
3-7. The good ones—the ones with Jerry
Orbach as Detective Lennie Briscoe.
I have such a crush on him.
Anyway, in this dream Charlotte Bronte the snail was
on trial for murder of a homeless man. I missed all the Law part…I did not
dream of her arrest, only the Order part where she was actually on trial. She
was being defending by Jack McCoy
(played by Sam Waterston) and the
prosecutor was Tovah Feldshuh (she
is on many episodes as a lawyer). I think of all the lawyers that have repeat
parts on the show my dream picked her because she is also in another favourite
show Crazy Ex Girlfriend playing Rachel
Bloom’s mother.
Interestingly, as I write this I have just realised
that the roles were reversed—on the show McCoy always is the prosecutor, not
the defence. In the dream, he was the defence.
Much of the dream is lost into the ether, but a few
fragments remain which I will try to recreate them for you.
They had Charlotte in her little terrarium on the
witness stand.
Tovah
Feldshuh: Where
were you the night John Doe was murdered?
Charlotte:
(eats lettuce)
Tovah
Feldshuh: I
ask you again, where were you?
Charlotte:
(eats lettuce)
Jack
McCoy: Your
honour, she’s a snail. She can’t talk.
Judge: Sit down, Mr McCoy. The witness
must answer the question.
Charlotte:
(eats lettuce)
Jack
McCoy: The
witness can’t answer! She’s a snail, for God’s sake!
Judge: Pipe down, Mr McCoy
or I will find you in contempt.
Tovah
Feldshuh: Permission
to treat as hostile, your honour?
Judge:
Permission
granted.
Tovah
Feldshuh: (takes
lettuce leaf away)
I don’t remember what else happened here, but the next
bit I remember was this.
Tovah
Feldshuh: You
claim your name is Charlotte but isn’t it true you are both male and female. A
hermaphrodite!
Jack
McCoy: Objection!
Irrelevant!
Tovah
Feldshuh: Goes
to credibility, your honour. If the witness lied about this, then we can show
she lied about other things.
Jack
McCoy: The
witness can’t lie. She’s a snail!
Judge:
Overruled. I’ll allow
it. Answer the question, Miss Bronte.
Charlotte:
(eats lettuce)
Tovah
Feldshuh: Isn’t
it true that as a Giant African Land Snail that you are a menace to society,
eating everything that gets in your path?
Jack
McCoy: Objection!
Tovah
Feldshuh: Giant
African Land Snails have been known to decimate crops. Is that what you did to
John Doe? Did you decimate him, too?
Jack
McCoy: Objection!She’s badgering the witness! Snails
don’t eat people! They are vegetarians! Besides, that’s not even what happened
to the victim.
Judge:
Calm down, Mr
McCoy. I’ll allow it.
The rest of the trial is a blur, but the ending I
remember clearly.
Judge:
Madame forewoman,
you have deliberated for three days. Is there any indication that if you have
more time, you will be able to reach a verdict?
Forewoman:
No, your honour. We
are deadlocked.
Judge:
Then I have no
recourse, but to declare a mistrial. (bangs gavel) The jury is dismissed.
The last bit of the dream took place in Adam Schiff’s office. In the show they
always end with him saying something pithy in his trademark gruff way. God
bless Steven Hill who was a
wonderful character actor in this role.
Adam
Schiff: Well,
you got the snail off. Until the next trial.
Jack
McCoy: I
heard it was eleven to one. Eleven people could clearly see that a small snail
couldn’t have possibly stabbed a homeless man 37 times. Snails can’t hold a
knife. They’ve got no arms!
Adam
Schiff: One
holdout, eh? Must have been a gardener.
So, this is what happens when you watch too much crime
drama from the 1990’s.
Hello and
welcome to Murder Ballad Monday. Last week we took a small detour into the land
of disco, but this week we look at a more serious murder ballad that is based
on a true story.
These days, sadly, there are many incidents of
school shootings. This was one of the first to really make headlines due to the senseless nature of the shooting--a crime with no real reasons.
On January 29, 1979 in San Diego, California, 16-year-old Brenda Spencer fired thirty rounds of ammunition
into the schoolyard of Grover Cleveland Elementary School from her house across
the street, killing the principal and a custodian as well as wounding eight
children and a police officer. She then barricaded herself in her house.
A reporter reached Spencer by phone while she was
still in the house after the shooting, and asked her why she did it. She
answered: "I don't like Mondays.
This livens up the day."
Prior to the shooting, Spencer had
been a pupil at a facility for problem students due to issues with truancy as
well as burglary and shooting BB guns to kill birds in her neighbourhood. A
psychiatric evaluation arranged by her probation officer recognised Spencer as suicidal and recommended she be
admitted to a mental hospital for depression, but her father refused to
give permission For
Christmas 1978, her father gave her a Ruger
10/22 semi-automatic .22 caliber rifle with a telescopic
sight and 500 rounds of ammunition. Spencer later said, "I
asked for a radio and he bought me a gun." She speculated that her
father had wanted her to kill herself.
She was clearly very disturbed and in need of help.
Spencer was tried as an adult and was sentenced to 25 years to life in prison
and as of June 2017, remains incarcerated.
On the day of the shooting in 1979, Irish rocker Bob
Geldof, lead singer of The Boomtown Rats (later to star as Pink in Pink Floyd’s film The Wall
and to be the co-founder of Band Aid and Live Aid) was being
interviewed at a WRAS (Georgia State University's campus radio station) when he
heard the news come over the telex machine.
Telex machine: It was a bit like
sending a fax as it was connected to the phone. It was like a print version of
sending a Morse code telegraph communication.
According to Wikipedia, Geldof explained how he wrote the song:
I was doing a radio interview in Atlanta with [Johnnie]
Fingers and there was a telex machine beside me. I read it as it came out.
Not liking Mondays as a reason for doing somebody in is a bit strange. I was
thinking about it on the way back to the hotel and I just said 'Silicon chip
inside her head had switched to overload'. I wrote that down. And the journalists
interviewing her said, 'Tell me why?' It was such a senseless act. It was the
perfect senseless act and this was the perfect senseless reason for doing it.
So perhaps I wrote the perfect senseless song to illustrate it. It wasn't an
attempt to exploit tragedy.
Spiderman and I first heard this song
in 1990 when we were exchange students on our home-stay experience. We bought a
double cassette from Woolworth’s in Pinner entitled Milestonesand this was the second track on side one.
Just like Bob Geldof, we were struck with the
senselessness of it all. There was no reason behind it. These days, with every
tragedy that unfolds due to gun violence, I find myself thinking of this song.
I have included the lyrics below if you’d like to
follow along.
The
silicon chip inside her head
Gets switched to overload
And nobody's gonna go to school today
She's going to make them stay at home
And daddy doesn't understand it
He always said she was as good as gold
And he can see no reason
'Cause there are no reasons
What reason do you need to be sure
Oh,
oh, oh tell me why
I don't like Mondays
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
I want to shoot
The whole day down
The
Telex machine is kept so clean
As it types to a waiting world
And mother feels so shocked
Father's world is rocked
And their thoughts turn to their own little girl
Sweet sixteen ain't that peachy keen
Now, it ain't so neat to admit defeat
They can see no reasons
'Cause there are no reasons
What reason do you need oh, woah
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
I want to shoot
The whole day down
Down, down
Shoot it all down
All
the playing's stopped in the playground now
She wants to play with her toys a while
And school's out early and soon we'll be learning
And the lesson today is how to die
And then the bullhorn crackles
And the captain tackles
With the problems and the how's and why's
And he can see no reasons
'Cause there are no reasons
What reason do you need to die, die
Oh,
oh, oh and the silicon chip inside her head
Gets switched to overload
And nobody's gonna go to school today
She's going to make them stay at home
And daddy doesn't understand it
He always said she was as good as gold
And he can see no reason
'Cause there are no reasons
What reason do you need to be sure
Tell
me why
I don't like Mondays
Tell me why
I
don't like Mondays
Tell me why
I don't like, I don't like, I don't like Mondays
Tell me why
I don't like, I don't like, (tell me why) I don't like Mondays
Tell me why
I don't like Mondays
I want to shoot, the whole day down
That’s all for this week. Stay tuned next week for a
very different sort of school shooting.
Hello lovelies! The day has somehow gotten away from me. It's nearly time to cook dinner and I realised I hadn't done a What we Ate Wednesday.
So, I thought I would write about a quick treat that saved my butt a few weeks ago. (In fact, I just made some right before typing this and I can attest they are super easy to make when you want a treat, but are time crunched.)
Anyway, a few weeks ago we were invited out to dinner with non vegan friends. They are really nice people and are all curious about veganism. I like to bring a vegan dessert to these sorts of gatherings as it is good publicity for the vegan diet. When you show people that food tastes good and you are not missing out on things, people are more willing to embrace change.
Normally, I bake. But I realised a few hours before the meal I didn't have the ingredients for brownies. Yikes! I thought about some raw chocolate brownie balls I used to make years back that were really good. I hoiked my enormous recipe binder up on the table and flipped to the pink section which is desserts. And yes, before you ask....all my recipes are in a D ring binder and they are divided into categories with colour coded tabs for ease of use because I am organised.
So, I find the recipe. Alas! It uses 1.5 cups of nuts--3/4 cup each almonds and walnuts. I don't have 1.5 cups of nuts. Nuts are expensive, people! Now that we stick to a food budget, we just don't eat nuts in those quantities anymore. I'm not saying it is not a good recipe. it is. You can see it {HERE}
I'm just saying, it is too expensive to make. These days the rule is half a cup of nuts or less or we don't eat it.
So, what do I do? I don't want to let people down by not bringing a dessert, but it needs to be made with stuff already in my kitchen. Time is flying.
Tick-Tock.
I run to the computer and I google nut + free+ chocolate + balls + food + processor and lo and behold {THIS} pops up.
Hallelujah! We have a winner!
I quickly threw everything in the food processor, rolled 'em up into balls and rolled those balls in desiccated coconut. Done. Sorted. Finished. Boom.
They were a HUGE hit. Everyone liked them because they were portion controlled, but rich tasting. I had two people ask for the recipe.
As I said, today had sort of gotten away from me and I wanted to make us a treat, but hadn't had time to bake. I made these lovely treats and while I was rolling them up I thought to myself, "Hey! You haven't posted a recipe today!"
So, here we are. Full circle.
Here is my adaptation of Wallflower Kitchen's recipe. She used medjool dates which are big and soft and expensive. i used slightly less sweet semi-dried deglat noor dates that I bought at Lidl which are smaller and cheaper. You do need soft dates for this to work, but they can also be cheaper dates. I added a little extra sweetener to mine to help out.
Last Minute Coconut Brownie Balls
Makes 20.
In a food processor pulse until oats are broken down:
1 cup (GF) oats
3 Tb cocoa powder
pinch salt
Then add the following and blend.
8 medjool dates or 15 deglat noors
1 TB liquid sweetener (I used golden syrup) Omit if you can afford to use medjools as they are sweeter.
Stop and add a TB of water a time until it sticks together when you squeeze some in your hand. This was 2 TB on a rainy day and 3 TB on a dry day.
Roll into balls and roll in unsweetened shredded coconut.
Store in the fridge.
I had the whole lot done in 15 minutes. They are perfect when you want a quick treat that is healthy.
Now I'm off to make dinner. Tally-ho! Until next week!
Loyal reader, I had not intended to include this song in my list of favourite murder ballads. It had completely slipped my mind. As I was writing last week's entry I was completely prepared to move straight into a song about a school shooting. I had the next seven weeks of murder ballads planned out.
Then last week, I was listening to the radio and this song came on. I boogied around our kitchen pretending to be a sexy showgirl until the part of the song comes on and you don't know who has been shot and I suddenly realised--This is a murder ballad.
I had never considered it that way before, but it fits. It has all the hallmarks of a murder ballad. It tells a story. A jealous lover. Someone dies. A mystery. It just does it to a disco beat. It's from Barry Manilow's 1978 album Even Now.
This was a favourite song from my childhood, precisely because it tells a story that could be easily acted out. I spent a great portion of my childhood dressing up and acting in front of a mirror. I preferred characters who were sad or downtrodden or bravely dying so I could try to make myself cry. I played orphans, teens with a drinking problem or unwanted pregnancy as well as Beth from Little Women and Lenny shooting George from Of Mice and Men.
Lola the showgirl was perfect for me as she showed character progression. One minute she was doing the cha-cha, the next she was a faded alcoholic. I had this yellow sparkly outfit that I had left over from a dance recital that had some yellow feathers on it. I used to put it on and reenact this song in front of the mirror. It was also the perfect song for me as I loved (still do!) disco. Spiderman says this tells you everything you need to know about me.
I loved the very precise descriptions--they worked from eight til four. I used to ponder over that. Was that eight at night until four in the morning? Surely not! But it was a club . . . so perhaps so. We get a good description of Lola's clothing (yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there) but we never find out about Tony's appearance. He tended bar, so I always pictured him in one of those half aprons and looking like Isaac the bartender from The Love Boat as this was my entire frame of reference for bartenders at this point in my life. Now Rico, he wore a diamond. I spent many hours contemplating this fact. Where did he wear it? As a pin on his lapel? In a ring? I asked my father where men might wear a diamond and he suggested cuff links and then explained what cuff links were. I rejected this theory because cuff links come in pairs and the song only mentions a diamond in singular. My father then suggested it was on his tie-pin. I also loved the mystery element to it. You know that Tony and Rico had a struggle and as the song says, But just who shot who?
Then you find out that Tony was killed which caused Lola to sit there so refined and drink herself half-blind and you are left to wonder--what happened to Rico? Was he charged with murder? Sound effect fact: I adored the bit where Rico called her over and whistled. I used to act this bit too as I knew just what sort of "c'mon" gesture that was required.
Silly fact: My friend Tammy and I used to occasionally sing the lyrics She lost her youth and she lost her toenail, now she's lost her mind.
So, here I leave you with the only disco murder ballad I am aware of. If you know of another one, please let me know.
I have printed the lyrics below in case you would like to follow along.
And to double your pleasure, here is Liza Minnelli singing Copacabana on the Muppet Show.
Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there
She would merengue and do the cha-cha
And while she tried to be a star, Tony always tended bar
Across a crowded floor, they worked from 8 till 4
They were young and they had each other
Who could ask for more?
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana)
The hottest spot north of Havana (here)
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa....they fell in love
(Copa Copacabana)
His name was Rico, he wore a diamond
He was escorted to his chair, he saw Lola dancin' there
And when she finished, he called her over
But Rico went a bit too far, Tony sailed across the bar
And then the punches flew and chairs were smashed in two
There was blood and a single gun shot
But just who shot who?
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana)
The hottest spot north of Havana (here)
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa....she lost her love
(Copa. . Copacabana)
(Copa Copacabana) (Copacabana, ahh ahh ahh ahh) (Music and passion...always the fashion)
Her name is Lola, she was a showgirl
But that was 30 years ago, when they used to have a show
Now it's a disco, but not for Lola
Still in the dress she used to wear, faded feathers in her hair
She sits there so refined, and drinks herself half-blind
She lost her youth and she lost her Tony
Now she's lost her mind!
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana (Copacabana)
The hottest spot north of Havana (here)
At the Copa (CO!), Copacabana
Music and passion were always the fashion
At the Copa....don't fall in love
(Copa) don't fall in love
Copacabana
Copacabana
That's all for this week. Stay tuned next week for a murder ballad about a school shooting.
Hello lovelies! Autumn is definitely in the air. It makes me crave warm spiced food in autumnal colours. How about you?
I recently borrowed a cookbook from the library. It was a weighty tome, the latest from Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall entitled Much More Veg. There was this interesting recipe that was an orange spiced barley. It took an hour to prepare and was made to feed six people. I liked the idea, but didn't want to feed a crowd (just two greedy vegans), plus I wanted it gluten free.
So, I copied the spice profile, made it with rice and chickpeas to make it more of a meal and served it with some roasted root veggies. I think Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall would approve.
It was delicious and had a real autumnal taste--like an orange pilaf. And the flavour of the rice was greatly enhanced by the carrots and parsnips.
Autumn Spiced Rice with Roasted Parsnips and Carrots
Preheat your oven to 220C/425F and put your roasting pan in the oven while it heats up. This is secret to making good roasties.
For the roasties:
Slice two carrots and two parsnips into long batons and place in a large bowl with one TB oil and salt and pepper and set aside for oven to heat.
For the rice: 1 onion, finely chopped 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1/2 tsp EACH turmeric, smoked paprika, cinnamon and chilli flakes zest and juice of one orange 1 1/4 cup hot vegetable broth 1/2 cup easy cook brown rice 1 tin chickpeas, drained and rinsed 3 TB raisins 6 semi-dried apricots, snipped into tiny pieces 1/2 cup defrosted frozen peas
When the oven has preheated, carefully take out the hot roasting pan and throw in your roasties. They will sizzle! Spread them out so they are all in one layer and put in the oven for 20 minutes. Meanwhile, start the rice as soon as the roasties go in the oven.
In a large pot, cook your onion and garlic in a splash or oil or water for a few minutes until softened. then add your spices, rice and raisins and stir to coat.
Add your orange juice and zest, plus the boiling vegetable stock. Bring to the boil then reduce heat, cover and simmer until rice is nearly cooked. (It will take longer than normal due to the orange juice)
When the timer goes off for the roasties, take them out and stir. Then drizzle with liquid sweetener like maple syrup, agave or golden syrup. Put back in the hot oven until the pilaf is ready.
When the rice is nearly ready, add the chickpeas, defrosted peas and apricots. Let it continue cooking until all the liquid has absorbed and the peas are warmed.
The warming spices and delicate orange flavour really are enhanced by the sweetness of the dried fruit as well the caramelised roasties. Definitely a meal we will have again throughout the autumn.
It was also economical as there were lots of dried apricots left for snacking as well as putting in a cake (I used my standard vanilla cake recipe, but subbed orange juice for the plant based milk and added warming spices like cinnamon and ginger and threw in some diced apricots).
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