I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa

Hello lovelies! As a member of the Do-It-Yourself Beauty Brigade, I wanted to share some of my homemade beauty secrets. The best bit about them is the all revolve around CHOCOLATE.

Yeah, you heard me correctly. Chocolate. Cocoa. The baking stuff. So not only is this good for your skin and hair, it is edible. Bonus.


I use cocoa in a variety of beauty treatments and I'll tell you why.

It is natural.
It smells amazing.
It s cheap.
It really works.

The website BEAUTY MUNSTA has this to say about the benefits of cocoa powder (with a few notes from me):

Skin repair: Yes, cocoa powder helps repair skin cells! That’s because it is packed with antioxidants that fight off free radicals. Free radicals are unstable molecules that steal oxygen from skin cells to balance themselves. In the process, they make skin cells lose oxygen and become lifeless. This causes a variety of skin problems like blemishes, dull looking skin and more. So, make a cocoa powder face mask to repair your skin cells and rejuvenate your face!

 Improves Skin’s Hydration:  Did you know that cocoa powder can actually improve its natural hydration? This works when you consume cocoa powder or apply it on your skin!  

Exfoliates Dead Cells: Cocoa powder has a gentle exfoliating texture that helps slough off dead cells on skin. It is good for carefully exfoliating sensitive or acne prone skin without irritating it. Personal note:  This really works. I have been making a face mask and applying it every “Self -Care Saturday” and have seen my skin be brighter and softer.

Face mask: In a little dish mix 1 TB unsweetened cocoa powder with 1 tsp sugar and 1 tsp oil of your choice. I like sunflower oil as in is non comedogenic (won’t break me out) and is high in vitamin e. I have very combination skin, so my skin is can’t decide if it wants to be an oily teenager or a mature adult. Wet your skin with warm water then mix all those ingredients into a paste and carefully rub all over your face avoiding the eye area. It is ok to put it on your lips because it can help exfoliate dry lips and if it gets in your mouth it’s fine because it is edible. Leave on while relaxing (preferably while resting with closed eyes on a yoga mat while listening to Enya) then using wet hand carefully scrub your face letting the sugar exfoliate and rinse off with warm water.

 Fights Acne & Pimples: This cacao face mask for acne works wonders in reducing the appearance of acne and pimples. Cocoa lessens redness and inflammation caused by acne. Find the cacao face mask recipe here: DIY Cacao Face Mask for Acne

 Prevents Sun Damage: You know when they say ‘eat your sunscreen.’ Well add cocoa powder to your list of sunscreen foods because it helps prevent sun damage! A study published in the Journal of Nutrition in 2006 showed that a group of women given a flavanol rich cocoa drink showed 15% less reddening of the skin when exposed to UV light. This is due to its high antioxidant content which fights off free radicals generated when UV light hits the skin.

 Improves Skin Complexion: Cocoa can improve your skin complexion, making it brighter and clearer! The flavanols in it nourish the skin, boost its elasticity and help reduce blemishes that make skin dull.

 Firms Skin: The caffeine and theobromine found in cocoa powder make skin firm, taut and toned. That’s because they help break down fats and eliminate excess fluid retention. So, if you have sagging skin, puffy skin and even under eye bags, try making a mask out of cocoa powder and applying it to your face for a few minutes.

Makes Hair Shiny & Soft: Cocoa powder isn’t just good for skin, it’s great for hair too! It contains a significant amount of sulphur, which is one of the most important minerals for hair health. Consuming cocoa powder makes your hair shiny and soft naturally.

 Darkens Hair Naturally: This delicious powder doesn’t just stop at making hair soft and shiny! It also gradually darkens hair and helps cover up greys. So, if you’re a brunette, try making a cocoa hair mask or even mixing cocoa powder in warm water and using it as a hair rinse. Personal note: This really works. I have stopped dyeing my hair and have successfully darkened my light brown hair to a lovely medium brown shade by doing this.

Hair darkener: Mix equal quantities of unsweetened cocoa powder and your favourite shampoo. It will be the texture of that ready to spread canned frosting you can buy in a shop. Store it in a jar. With dry hands scoop a little out and rub your palms together until they are evenly coated. Rub into your hair and really massage it in. Then rinse, but don’t over rinse. I have crazy oily hair like a teenager and this has actually helped to dry it out a bit. If you do not have teenage hair, then feel free to mix equal parts of the cocoa powder with your favourite conditioner as well

Slows Down Ageing of Skin: Cocoa powder is rich in antioxidants called flavanols. The powerful 

antioxidant properties of flavanols help fight free radicals, hence making skin youthful for longer. Consume cocoa powder and also use it externally to plump your skin cells and fight premature wrinkles!

 Reduces Cellulite: Enjoy the cellulite clearing powers of cocoa powder! Because of its caffeine and theobromine content, cocoa powder helps drain fatty cells, promote flow of excess fluids out of the body which helps clear off cellulite by firming and tightening the skin. Drink cocoa powder and also make a cocoa coffee scrub to help you with this!

Cocoa Coffee Cellulite Scrub: In a large bowl, add ¼ cup cocoa powder, ½ cup ground coffee and ¼ cup liquid coconut oil. Now add 1 tsp cinnamon powder. Mix everything well to form a soft scrub. Transfer the scrub into an air tight container. To use, place 1 tbsp in a bowl and take the bowl to the shower with you. Scoop up a little and rub in circular motions over wet skin that has cellulite. Leave it on for a couple of minutes then rinse off and wash your body as usual. Use every other day in the shower.

Personal note: if you'd like a body scrub, but like me don't drink coffee so don't have any coffee grounds just hanging around try this body scrub. It makes you smell like a York Peppermint Patty (US Version) Fry's Peppermint Cream (UK version.) 

Chocolate Peppermint Body Scrub: In a jar mix 1 cup sugar, 2 TB liquid soap (helps it to wash away easier), 3 TB cocoa powder, a few TB oil to make it a paste, 10 drops peppermint essential oil. With dry hands (water can aid in breeding bacteria) scoop out and bit and scrub your body in the bath or shower. Your body will be soft and smell amazing. 

Add to your Dry Shampoo: DIY dry shampoo is all the rage these days and what’s more is that it’s so easy to make! Cocoa powder is one of the main ingredients for brunette or dark hair types. Here’s how to make dry shampoo with cocoa powder:

Amazing DIY Dry Shampoo: In a bowl, mix up 1 tbsp arrow root powder, 1 tbsp baking soda, ½ tbsp cocoa powder and 3-5 drops lavender essential oil. Dip a brush into the bowl and dab it on your hair roots starting from one side going to the other. Let it sit for a couple of minutes then brush your hair and voila! Your hair will be soft, fluffy and look and feel clean!

So, that's the wonders of cocoa! Let me know if you have a go at any of these beauty tips.

Tying myself in knots: Why Zero Waste is a myth (but why we still have to try)

Greetings and salutations, my eco-conscious friends.  Do you ever feel overwhelmed by it all?

Trying to be a good person in a world that largely doesn't give a shit is hard.

When you want to buy things there are so many things to consider:

Is it vegan? Does it contain animal ingredients?

Is it cruelty free? Was it tested on animals? 

Does it contain harsh chemicals that disrupt hormones or are used in antifreeze?

What sort of packaging does it come in? Is it reusable? Or recyclable? 

How much does it cost? 

This is why I make so many things like tooth powder, moisturiser, make up and deodorant because I can't find something that meets all the above criteria. 

If it's food you also have to think about things like:

Food miles

Packaging (again)

Is it vegan? (again...animal products can sneak into products in ways you don't expect)

How was it grown? Is it organic?

How much does it cost?  

The problem is we are on an immensely tight budget. This is the life we have chosen and are happy to do so. We work less and so have lots of time to do the things we love, spend time together, be in nature, rest, read, relax, create and enjoy life. But it comes at the price of having to watch our pennies. 

So for us cost is *always* a factor. When you add in all the other things it can feel really overwhelming. Do you buy the organic apples if they come from New Zealand? What if  the only organic apples come in a non-recyclable plastic bag? 

If you can even afford organic. But you can't NOT afford to! I hear people cry. Well, our food budget is £30 a week. We don't drive. We don't have a farmer's market nearby. 

I get so sick of watching smug videos of Zero Waste Gits--I mean Vloggers, showing off their tiny jar of the last two years worth of garbage and going on and on and on about the great farmer's market and buying all organic produce and then popping over the Bulk Bin shop and bringing their own containers and then spending a ruddy fortune on a toothbrush made from bamboo. Since they didn't know which kind of bamboo toothbrush they wanted, they ordered 5 different expensive kinds before settling on the perfect one. They just spent £30 on toothbrushes. That could feed us for a week.

We don't live in a market town anymore like we did in England. Without a car, the supermarket is our only choice for food. The nearest Bulk bin shop is in Pontardawe. That's 30 miles. 

I found a Zero Waste Starter Kit for sale online. You got trendy, matchy-matchy things like a glass water bottle, stainless steel reusable container, bamboo cutlery, cloth napkin, reusable ceramic coffee cup in an organic cotton bag for £55. 

FIFTY FIVE POUNDS, PEOPLE. 

It just makes you feel overwhelmed like a deer in the headlights. It makes you think:

This is impossible.

I can't afford this.

I'll never be able to get all my rubbish in a small jar.

I might as well give up.

Then I gave myself a good talking to and said:

You are the Amazing Spidergrrl. you can do this.

You are the Queen of DIY.

You love to research and find a bargain. See what you can reduce (like plastic packaging) and still stay under budget. 

You can make stuff. You can sew.

Be more gentle with yourself. Progress not perfection. 

You already do things like always have a water bottle and carry reusable bags. You probably already do more than you realise. 

Just take some baby steps and keep adding in good things to your journey. 

So, I started to alter my google searches. I searched for things like Zero Waste Cheap and Zero Waste Budget and I found a Vlogger called Leafeco. 

This woman speaks my language. She has a great video about setting up your own Zero Waste Kit with stuff you probably already had. Suddenly, all my worries melted away. I can do this. I may not get to a little jar, but I can make better choices and not go into debt. 

Watch her video here and get inspired. 

So, I have made myself a DIY Zero Waste Kit out of stuff I already had and sewed myself something new to wrap my cutlery in as I wanted to improve on my previous attempt at a portable cutlery wrap.

You see? I already had a portable cutlery wrap! I am doing better than I thought.  I'm thinking of making some to sell in my Etsy shop. 

I'll blog about my Zero Waste Kit next time. . 

Rosemary for Remembrance (and other things)-Part 2

I go back and forth about deodorant.

I don't mean I go back and forth about wearing it.

I mean, I go back and forth about making it.

Many times over the years i have become fed up with commercial deodorants that contain  harsh chemicals and ingredients that may contribute to illness like breast cancer or Alzheimer's. I get worried that it has been tested on animals because they are owned by a company like Unilever.

So I start to buy the sort you can only buy in a health food shop that aren't tested on animals and have slightly less bad ingredients, but cost an arm and a leg. But they don't really work.

So i go back to buying cheaper commercially made deodorant that has the leaping bunny symbol, but stinks like a French Whorehouse. I wasn't too cut up that they discontinued it.

So i try my hand at make something.

Some were successes. The aloe vera gel, witch hazel and lavender oil one worked alright, but was really sloppy and difficult to put on. The gooey-ness seemed to cling in my pits for ages.

The coconut oil, baking soda and cornstarch one made my pits turn red like they were on fire after about a week.

So the cycle goes around again and I start to use a commercial one full of chemicals and I am unhappy.

So....when i was making up the rosemary vinegar for cleaning I wondered if you could infuse rosemary into something else and make deodorant?

I saw several testimonials from people who used half a lemon or lime rubbed into their pit and the acid killed the germs. But I don't have money to throw away by using half a fruit every single day.

I found lots of recipes that just used neat vodka as the alcohol killed germs. I thought about buying the cheapest vodka I could get and infusing the rosemary in that, but then i had a thought.

What if I just used the rosemary vinegar? 

If it didn't work, I haven't wasted anything because I already have it made and if I don't like it, it can go for cleaning.

I needed something to put it in and I wasn't sure if I wanted to use essential oils or not to give it a boost. If I did want to use essential oils then i would need a dark glass container as essentials oils degrade in plastic as well as in light.

I priced a bottle like this and found it out of my range.


So i bought one of these at Wilkinsons for 60p. You are meant to put vinegar in it as vinegar is a table condiment here in the UK like salt and pepper. Salt and vinegar chips....mmmmmm....

Then I covered it with layers of a purple-y blue tissue paper and lots of watered down white PVA glue to seal it and hot glued a bead over the little hole in the lid.

I used 1/3 cup rosemary vinegar and 1 Tablespoon witch hazel which is a pore tightener and helps reduce sweating. I might up it to 2 Tablespoons in the summer if I need it.

But so far....it works. I use the same cotton ball I use to apply toner to my face since the toner is just watered down apple cider vinegar. I just rub a bit under my arms and let it dry while I finish getting ready and then swipe on a second layer to dry before I leave the bathroom. Yes, i am sure if you shave your pits then it might sting, but since I don't shave this is not a problem for me.

It smells good. I ended up not adding any essential oils as I liked the rosemary smell and I haven't needed any extra oomph. Maybe I will in the summer. Who knows.

It passes the sniff test. Spiderman has been kind enough to be the chief sniffer and has detected zero offensive smells or any smells at all. I smell completely neutral.

Not like a French whorehouse.
Not like a chemistry class.
Not even like rosemary vinegar as the smell evaporates.

I just smell clean.

Is this too weird? Maybe. But it works and I am not being poisoned or spending all our money either.

Would you try it?

I’m cuckoo for cocoa (or maybe just plain cuckoo)

There are many needless vanities I have left behind. I wear plain clothes to help me focus on my spiritual journey rather than my outward appearance, I don’t wear any make up except some lip balm and I don’t shave my legs or my pits. That’s right, I’m a hairy fairy. I do still pluck the witchy hairs that seem to grow out of my chin as I get older, I do have some pride left. But mostly I am happy to be naturally me and I am radiant with happiness and the love of God and rude health and so I glow.

But hair seems to be my downfall.  When I went to plain dress I seemed to focus all my negative vanity issues on my hair. My hair is fine and straight and refuses to lie down where it should or stick up in a punky style the way I want it to in this damp climate that we call England.  My lowest point was Spiderman catching me checking myself out in the back of a spoon--the only reflective surface I could find. Sigh….so I started wearing a head covering. It really did help because now the part of my hair that refuses to behave cannot be seen. Problem solved, right?

Not really. I have issues with hair colour. I really, really, really hate my natural hair colour. It is a mouse brown the exact shade of a cardboard box. It has a way of making me look a bit pale with dark shadows under my eyes. I feel ugly when I see it. Growing up my mother constantly voiced her opinion that it didn’t suit me. I have no idea if it really suits me or not--maybe I am just really pale with dark shadows under my eyes. But having been told all my life that it is wrong I have a very hard time shaking that feeling. Spiderman says I am the loveliest woman in the world and I agree with about 95% of that. Except for my hair colour I seem to always add as a mental addendum to every compliment he gives me. How sad is that?

I have been dying my hair since I was 15. I’m now 42. You do the maths. It has been various shades of red from shiny conker to Ronald McDonald orange (that was an accident!) as well as black for a while in my “goth“ phase, blonde for a while the first year we were married, purple for a while in the 10^th grade (I got put into in-school suspension for that one--apparently my hair colour was against the dress code) but mostly in the last few years I have been a medium brown called “golden chestnut.”  In recent years I have switched from the cheap ones that you buy at the chemist full of nasties to the one you buy for twice as much at the health food shop that has considerably less nasties, but still has its share of them.

I was dyeing my hair every 5 weeks at £9 every time. That’s just about £90 a year. I am in frugal mode once again so I set about trying to think if there was a way to tame the beast that lurks within (who keeps saying ugly stuff about my hair) and a healthier, cheaper solution.

A year or so ago I had discovered that you can boil some tea, sage and rosemary and let it cool, strain out the bits and then thicken it with cornstarch and heat it up until it became a gel, then let it cool, then rub it into your hair, then wrap with cling film, then let it sit for 30 minutes, then rinse and it made your hair darker. Whew! Did you get tired of reading all those steps cos I sure as shit got tired of doing all that because you had to do it EVERY WEEK. I tried making up a big batch to last a couple of weeks but it went all funky as it had no preservatives. So I went back to old standby of “golden chestnut” in a £9 box. But now at week 6 with no golden chestnut to be found I decided to try the natural way again.

So I went back and did a bit more research. Thank you Google. I read that the same mixture of black tea, sage and rosemary could be made, strained and put in a spray bottle to cover grey by “staining“ it. Just make a new batch once a week. It makes sense--think how tea stains the bottoms of mugs.  Hmmm… I don’t actually have grey yet but that might be useful. Then I read that if you mix equal amounts of cocoa powder and shampoo together to make a frosting and you wash your hair with it, it will brown up lighter hair. Hmmm.. That sounded really good so after exercise I tried it and followed it up with a spray of the tea and herb solution.

Ya know what? It worked.  It is not dark like I dyed it, but it *is* slightly warmer…slightly browner…slightly nicer. And this is just day one. I think the colour will get richer and darker with cumulative use.

Now what I really wish is I didn’t feel like I needed to do this--but I do. Overwhelmingly I do.  Lately I have been thinking about what I need to feel happy. Darker hair makes me happy and then helps me to go on and do other things that make me happy like play the ukulele and not sitting around all po-faced every time I catch sight of myself in the mirror.

And cocoa powder and tea and herbs are much better for my body as well as my purse. So I guess I am cuckoo for cocoa or as Spiderman often reminds me--just plain cuckoo.

Awww..stop it, you’re making me blush

I prefer the natural look. That’s why I don’t shave my body hair, I like the animalistic look of my body in its natural state. I have never really been one for tonnes of make-up. Except in the 8^th grade where I thought it was a good idea to wear lots of navy blue eyeliner covered in sparkly peach eye shadow. My mum put a stop to that, thankfully. Back when we lived stateside you might say “She’s tarted up like a French whore” (no offence to the French) Over here in the UK if you wear lots of make-up you are called a slapper--because it looks like you slapped it on with a trowel, geddit?

However, in my natural state I am a bit pale. I like to cheat a bit and give myself that “Oh don’t you look healthy, have you just been on holiday glow” without it looking like I was wearing anything at all. For years I swore by Bonne Bell blushing gel. It came in a wee squeezy tube and looked bright red but went on your skin a nice rosy hue. Didn’t all American girls of the 80s go through a Bonne Bell faze? They had all these funky flavoured lip glosses called Lip Smackers that came 3 to a tube. Remember that, do you? Me too. And while I had buckets full of the lippy, the blushing gel was where my heart belonged. After a while (like after I was married) you couldn’t find any Bonne Bell for love nor money. I guess all the teenage girls from the 80s grew up and went on to proper make-up from Clinique or Estee Lauder, but not me.  And I have always looked for a comparable substitute. There is Benetint--that costs the same as a down payment on a small house (ok, maybe not that much, but like £21). The ingredients are oh so simple—water, rosewater, glycerine, Quaternium-15  and CARMINE. For those of you who don’t know carmine aka. cochineal it’s made from crushed up bugs. And I sure as hell wouldn’t want that on my face (or anywhere else) even if I wasn’t a vegan. But look out! Carmine/cochineal is everywhere. Where you least expect it--like grapefruit juice. If your grapefruit juice is not a natural brownish pink but rather a bright, dare I say fluorescent colour, I call carmine. Check the label and see if I’m wrong.

 So for years I have looked for one to buy that didn’t contain ingredients I avoid.  You probably think I spend my life reading labels. Well I do. But there are good reasons for that. Food wise, I don’t want to ingest any animal products--animals do not need to suffer and die for my plate. But there are lots of scary ingredients out there and so label reading is one of my hobbies.

Anyway, I have longed for a gel blush that would replicate those heady teenage years. I have some non coal tar make up pigments made from mica and iron oxides from a cosmetic making company just waiting to be used. I had made a cream blush by mixing pigment with a bit of unfragranced non petroleum based lotion. It was ok. A bit thick and didn’t blend well, but it was better than nothing. What I really needed was some aloe vera gel. But would you believe that EVERY tube I ever picked up was full of  crazy shit like 75 ingredients including propylene glycol and every kind of paraben preservative. Some even had SLS, for Frith’s sake. Why does your aloe vera need to be foamy?

Last week I found a tube of aloe vera gel from Holland and Barrett that contained 6 ingredients. Everything a-ok. The only small disappointment was that it contained sodium hydroxide which is lye. Lye features in real soap but KY Jelly also contains lye and you put that up your fanny, so it can’t be all that bad. 

  

So I have made a batch of red gel in a wee pot and have been test driving it for the last 7 days. It is JUST like my old Bonne Bell and all week long people have commented on how healthy I looked--how radiant--like I’d just finished having a brisk walk by the windswept seaside or been up to married things. So, yeah. I’d say complete success.

Two, Four, Six, Eight--How do you exfoliate?

Body scrubs are easy peasy Christmas gifts that can be made with stuff you find in your kitchen and are easily stored in small jars that have been washed out with hot water and the label soaked off. Salsa jars are just the right size for this. They make excellent Christmas gifts. I keep a jar of this in our bathroom at all times. I like to use Fairtrade ingredients if at all possible. It means your gift gives back to the farmers as well.

CHOCOLATE BODY SCRUB

1 cup Fairtrade demerara sugar

2 TB liquid soap (makes it easier to wash off)

2 TB Fairtrade cocoa powder

1 tsp vanilla essence

Oil (I like sunflower oil)

Mix all ingredients in a bowl and then add oil until it is as wet as you want it. Store in a wide mouth jar that you have washed out with hot water.

                               

 AUTUMN SPICE SCRUB

½ cup  polenta (cornmeal)

½ cup ground oats (oat flour)

2 TB liquid soap (makes it easier to wash off)

1 tsp nutmeg

½ tsp ginger

½ tsp cloves

10 drops orange essential oil (nice but you can leave it out)

Oil (I like sunflower oil)

Make the oat flour by putting some oats in your food processor and zooshing them until they are all powdery. The name says it all, really. Mix all ingredients in a bowl and then add oil until it is as wet as you want it. Store in a wide mouth jar that you have washed out with hot water.

They are good enough to eat, but don’t try it because of the soap in there. It will taste like yack. But if you want one you can eat try this one. It’s like washing your face with cake.

MARZIPAN FACIAL SCRUB

2 TB ground almonds a.k.a. almond meal (look on the baking aisle at your local supermarket)

2 TB dried shredded coconut

2 TB Fairtrade sugar

4-5 TB vegetable glycerine --enough to make a paste.

Glycerine is a by product of the soap industry so be sure you get one labelled vegetable glycerine otherwise it will have tallow in it from animal fat. Craft stores are good about having vegetable glycerine. Glycerine is a humectant--it draws moisture to it. It is completely edible and very sweet--diabetics beware. It is sold in the UK on the cough and cold aisle at Boots for soothing dry, sore throats.

Mix all ingredients in a bowl and then add glycerine until it is as wet as you want it. Store in a wide mouth jar that you have washed out with hot water.

I wash my face with this twice a week and my skin is really clear.

Enjoy and yum yum!

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme...well Sage and Rosemary

I have been trying to avoid dying my hair for some time as I don’t think it is particularly good for me--I knew about the increase in bladder cancer for people who have been dyeing for a number of years (which I have. Since the age of 15. Now I’m 40. Do the math. But if you can’t then just know that’s quite a long time) but a recent magazine article also said an increase in lymphoma--which is the sort of cancer the Amazing Spiderman had the fourth year we were married. But also exposure to so many chemicals (even when you buy the health food shop brand with no ammonia) is not healthy. Plus all those animal derived/animal tested ingredients to avoid. Nightmare.


So I have been trying (fairly unsuccessfully) to like the hair I have. The problem is that my hair is brown. This is not such a problem in itself, but it is the shade of light brown I detest. Akin to a cardboard box with the occasional grey popping in (although to be fair my grey seems to be mostly whiskers. I am forever plucking some witchy hair from my chin.) The shade that I think looks best on me is a reddish brown or golden chestnut or 4G if you go by the box of stuff I paid £8 for at the health food shop. This slightly darker brown with reddish highlights makes my skin look smoother and clearer. It brings colour to my cheeks. It is just is the shade I was meant to have been born with. So what’s a crunchy granola girl to do on the cheap?

Well……..I did some research in all the herbal books I owned (which are many) and did some googling (which spell check doesn’t recognise as a verb, but I feel certain it will in the future) and came up with a plan. Good herbs for naturally darkening and covering grey in brown hair are SAGE and ROSEMARY. Woohoo I have these on my spice rack. Also BLACK TEA can stain hair. I have Fair Trade teabags. Again Woohoo. So what to do?

Make an infusion of 2TB each sage and rosemary and one teabag and cover with boiling water--about 1 ¼ to 1 ½ cups. I just eyeballed it. Make the infusion in something glass as all the books said metal can do something weird to the herbs. I just poured it in my pyrex measuring cup. Then cover (I used a plastic bag that would later go on my head) to keep all the volatile oils from escaping like convicts from a chain gang. Then go about your merry way and do something for 45 minutes while it steeps and cools. I did 45 minutes of Disco Aerobics with one of the Nolan Sisters on DVD, but hey--do what you like.

Then come back and strain it through some muslin and a strainer if you’re an eco gal like me or through paper towels and a strainer if you are a tree killer. Then put in a pot (had to do metal here as I didn’t have any glass pots). Scoop out a bit into another container and whisk with a few TB arrowroot powder then add back to the mixture. Then boil and thicken. Remove from the heat see if it is thick and gooey enough for you. I had to put it back on to boil with another TB of arrowroot. I used 3 TB in all. Make sure if you have to add some more you use a few TB COLD water to add the last TB arrowroot to. Otherwise you’ll get lumpy gravy. Eventually it will be a dark brown slightly slimy/sticky goop. Go away again and do something while it cools. Do NOT try to stick your fingers in to see what it feels like or you will get burned. Ask me how I know. While I waited for cool down I mixed a loaf of beer bread and put it in the oven to bake and used the rest of the beer to make a marinade with lime juice, tamari and chilli powder for my Baja Tempeh Tacos for tomorrow. Yum Yum.

When it is sufficiently cool, go to bathroom and lay some newspaper in your sink. This goop gets everywhere and stains a bit like how tea does in the bottom of your tea cup. I didn’t use newspaper and had to rub the limes I juiced for the marinade around the sink with some baking soda afterwards.

Do it just like hairdye--section off and clip and get it all rubbed in there. Comb it through. It smells really nice if you like rosemary (which I do) and when you’re all saturated pop a plastic bag on your head--not your whole head obviously or you'd suffocate. And look stupid. I reused the one I had covered the pyrex cup with because I'm such a girly swot. Then walk around with a bag on your head looking like you've got a jherri curl for 30 minutes. Then rinse and shampoo and condition as usual. I washed out the plastic bag and left it to dry. I’ll write on it with a sharpie that it is for hairdye and I’ll put in my secret drawer with my lip balm pots and candelilla wax and bath bomb moulds.

I have to say--my hair is almost exactly the shade of 4G from the box. It is darker brown with red highlights and smells of rosemary and is as soft as if I washed it in rainwater. Now the question is how long will it last. I am reliably informed that you need to do it every week to keep it up which is no big deal. I have quite short hair and so had quite a bit of goop left. But also being make-it-yourself- gal I own a non-paraben preservative from a cosmetic supplier and so I just preserved mine and put it in a reused salsa jar to save for next time.

I am also told that doing a final rinse after washing with the same infusion--sage, rosemary and tea can help keep the colour going. Kinda like a kitchen version of Roux Fanciful--anyone remember that stuff? I am about a day away from using the last dregs of shampoo so I’ll do the infusion, preserve (as it contains water that can grow nasty bacteria if you just let it sit for days--but I am too lazy to make a new infusion every day) and then decant into ye olde shampoo bottle and presto! Squeeze a bit on my hair in the tub and then rinse the tub out immediately. Way hey! Hair dye from my kitchen!